Divorce is not just a difficult time for the couple but also for the children. No child wants to see their parents fight and live in separate houses. When divorces happen, children are the most affected as they often have no idea what is happening and why their parents suddenly decided to take this big step. Therefore, it is crucial to maintain communication with your child.
Children do not just become “sad” when their parents get divorced. The effects are much more long-lasting. Psychological studies have shown that divorce affects mental health, future relationships, and even educational paths in children. However, if you are no longer happy in your relationship, you should hire a lawyer from the divorce law firm, Coil Law and file for divorce.
Tips to help your kids deal with your divorce
Let them know they are loved.
When one parent cancels plans with the children or does not visit more often, it can cause the children to think they are somehow to blame. They may feel that their father or mother no longer loves them now that they are divorced. You must assure your kids that the other parent’s lack of commitment does not have anything to do with them.
Children of divorce can benefit a lot from counseling. It can sound odd that small children can feel stressed and depressed, but that is exactly what happens when their parents get separated. Counseling will allow them to vent out their feelings in a neutral environment. It can also help them deal with their mental health issues healthily.
Explain the situation.
Instead of acting like everything is good between the two of you and lying to your children, it is better to explain the situation to them in a straightforward way. A sentence as simple as “Mom and dad were always fighting which made us all unhappy. So we decided to live in different places” can go a long way.
To help your kids take their minds off the divorce, you could plan fun outings such as picnics, movies, going to amusement parks, pools, etc. You can also plan these outings on days when the other parent fails to show up. Your child will no doubt be upset, so having a backup plan can lift their mood.
Tell them it is not their fault.
Often children think that their parents’ divorce is their fault by believing that their behaviors and habits may have caused problems. Make sure they know they had nothing to do with the divorce and that it was you and your ex’s choice completely.
Children, especially minor ones, are bound to be sad upon seeing their parents get separated. While one should work on their marriage for the sake of their children, it is not wise to stay where you are unhappy. If your marriage is no longer working out, contact a divorce attorney.